The Hidden Language of Leaders

When it comes to business interactions and leading a team, you'd think simple body language - such as eye contact or the crossing of arms - bears little significance, but the truth is these gestures can send a positive or negative message to employees.



There are two sets of signals a person gives off, said Carol Kinsey Goman, author of The Silent Language of Leaders: How Body Language Can Help - or Hurt - How You Lead. The first sets status and authority; the next gives off warmth and empathy.



The air of status and authority is given off by how people carry themselves, Kinsey Goman said. Details, such as a person's height, may make them look more powerful. Leaders can typically convey warmth and empathy by using open hand signals, tilting their heads, nodding and making eye contact.



"There's no good or bad body language signal; it depends on what your message is," Kinsey Goman said. "Is your body language supporting or sabotaging that message?"



Kinsey Goman cited an instance of a presenter who she said had the crowd mesmerized. At the conclusion of his speech, he said, "And now I'm open for questions," then crossed his arms and stared at the crowd. Not one person asked a question.



"No one in that audience said, 'Oh my gosh, he's crossed his arms, therefore I cannot think of a question,'" Kinsey Goman said. However, there must have been complete confusion in the audience's brains.



If the speaker's message was to invite questions, he needed to realize that crossing his arms sabotaged that message; however, he was oblivious to this contradictory movement.



Aileen Pincus, principal and CEO of the Pincus Group, a communications consulting firm, explained that her company is usually asked to help with delivery issues - seldom content issues - even though the two are intertwined.



"For instance, if you're hesitant about something because you're not sure what you're saying is 100 percent accurate or whether you're behind what you're saying 100 percent, it's going to show," Pincus said. There are times when people who come in for training are put in positions where they must deliver information they don't believe or are not confident about.



In order to appear confident, leaders have to believe in what they're saying. "We have to work through those delivery issues," she said.



They also have to take into account one-on-one time with employees. If a difficult message has to be delivered to an employee, such as needing to let them go, it's OK for the leader to show his or her true feelings.



"If it's painful for you to have this conversation, it's fine to show it," Pincus said. "Why do you need to hide that? It'll make you appear more human, more empathetic."



By showing that emotion, leaders won't come across like they're acting.



"We don't want to act our way out of a bad situation," she said. One way to avoid acting is by taking time to prepare and anticipate reactions and questions before delivering a message to employees.



"Executives often misunderstand how much communication is going on nonverbally," Pincus said. This could include tone of voice, eye contact and other body language indicators.



We tend to trust what we see more than what we hear. If the two don't match, communication becomes difficult.



Consider public speaking as a forum of conversations, said Matt Eventoff, partner with Princeton Public Speaking.



"You're conversing whether people are responding to you verbally or not," he said. "Individuals in an audience give you a reaction."



Whether the audience members nod, shake their heads in agreement or disagreement - or even text - it's all a part of the conversation.



When it comes to communication, there's no good or bad, only what's appropriate for the situation.



That said, there are things leaders can do to make sure they're sending a positive message. Kinsey Goman offers the following body language tips for a successful collaboration:



1. Check Your Expectations.

"Pygmalion in the Classroom" was a study where children were chosen at random and identified to their teacher as high-achievers. Because the teacher expected more of them, the students, who were never told of their high-achieving status, had sharp increases on their IQ test scores at the end of the year. The positive expectation was delivered nonverbally and Dov Eden, a Tel Aviv University professor, found that if supervisors or managers hold positive expectations about the performance of the people they lead, that performance will improve.



2. Activate Your Smile Power.

A smile can stimulate one's sense of well-being. It can also tell others how approachable, cooperative and trustworthy a person is.



3. Use Your Head.

Kinsey Goman has found that people will speak more if the listener nods in clusters of three at regular intervals. Tilting your head is also a signal of being involved and interested.



4. Look at People When They Speak.

People will feel like they have your attention as long as you're making eye contact. Avoid checking text messages, glancing at your watch or looking at others' reactions.



5. Use the "Ultimate Connective Gesture."

When making an uplifting statement - for example, "This is a wonderful opportunity" - Kinsey Goman suggests gesturing toward the listener with an upward open palm and bringing the hands back to the body. According to her example, you would start your gesture at the word "wonderful" and bring the gesture in at "opportunity." A nonverbal, positive connection can be made this way.



6. Remove Barriers.

Face people you are speaking with directly. Remove barriers by closing your laptop, turning off a cellphone or putting a briefcase to the side.





[About the Author: Natalie Morera is an associate editor for Talent Management magazine.]